This is the kind of intense, borderline scientific dedication to a favorite food we can all get behind! Witness a truly wild piece of math used to quantify the *depth* of one person's love for soup. What makes this moment even better? It pivots into the *perfect*, albeit fragile, plan for surviving Thanksgiving—finding common ground by complaining about *that* VP. Will this shared distaste be the unlikely glue that holds the holiday together before a certain relative surfaces from a toilet for a

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